What Students Want to Hear After Failure

Academic setbacks are common in college, yet instructor responses to poor performance vary widely and may shape students’ motivation, emotional reactions, and perceptions of faculty support. Prior work suggests that supportive communication matters, but less is known about which types of messages students prefer after academic failure or whether faculty accurately anticipate these preferences. The present research examined how college students and instructors evaluate different instructor responses to a disappointing exam grade and assessed alignment between student preferences and faculty perceptions. Using a mixed-methods design, college instructors and undergraduate students responded to parallel vignette scenarios involving a poor exam outcome and rated brief instructor comments representing three response types: solution-focused, emotional validation, and interpersonal affirmation. Participants also provided open-ended responses describing what they would say to a student or want to hear from an instructor. Across two studies, students rated affirmation as most effective, validation as moderately helpful, and solution-focused responses as least effective, despite perceiving solution-focused comments as most common in actual classrooms. Faculty in our sample rated validation and affirmation as more effective than solution-focused responses but primarily generated strategy-focused advice in their own responses. Faculty correctly anticipated students’ preference for encouragement but rarely offered such messages. These findings point to a gap between what faculty believe students value and what they typically communicate following academic setbacks, suggesting that incorporating brief affirming and emotionally responsive messages may strengthen student–teacher relationships by signaling care, understanding, and support in moments of academic difficulty.